Crumpet

Crumpet, by Mr.B The Gentleman Rhymer



I have been a fan of Mr.B The Gentleman Rhymer for…ooh…a good many years now, although I suppose was somewhat of a latecomer to the Chap Hop-iverse.

I’d dabbled on the fringes, of course. I’d revelled in the odd copy of The Chap magazine, toyed with a cravat at a gentleman’s outfitters, gazed longingly at a luxurious moustache across a crowded pub.

However, the epiphany came sometime in 2012. I don’t know the exact moment, but I do know it was on one of those lost days when one falls down the YouTube hole and, much like Alice, finds oneself in a topsy turvy universe where everything and nothing is what it seems.

In short, I happened upon the video for Hermitage Shanks and need I say more. I was hooked, dragged like a well-yanked chain, into the world of Chap Hop. I quickly watched as many videos as I could, by Mr.B of course and Professor Elemental, among others.

While I bought the Professor’s long players and loved them, there was something in the pure dedication to hip-hop and tweed that kept me coming back to Mr.B.

Can’t Stop, Shan’t Stop followed in 2013 – a work of musical genius and wit – and then There’s a Rumpus Going On in 2016, which, along with a couple of shorter works, kept my addiction fed.

I have to say, however, that Dandinista, released earlier this year, is perhaps Mr.B’s most satisfying work. The ingredients that have been present all along are there, but somehow more refined. The lyrics are sharper, the beats cleaner, the invention greater.

And out of all of those tracks, the one I’m obsessed with at the moment is Crumpet – although the nostalgic You Don’t Send Me Penis Growth Pill Emails Anymore gets played straight after…followed by Everybody Wants to Give Ice Cube a Cuddle and Barmy Fluid and then the rest of the album.


Escape, the debut thriller, is out now.

No Way Home and Dear Lucifer and Other Stories are also out now.
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